Catholic Second Graders
Being in Second Grade and being Catholic is a Big Deal. It is the year you cross into the Cool Kid Section. In second grade, you make two sacraments. First Confession (the scary one) and First Communion (the cool factor). That's probably kind of sacrilegious, but all of you Catholic readers out there know I am right!
The First Confession comes first. Just like in the movies, you talk to a priest and tell him all of the horrible sins you've committed in your seven or eight years thus far on Earth. You can either sit face to face with the priest, or talk to him through a screen.
I have distinct memories of my First Confession. In the weeks leading up to it, we spent hours with Sister Marie, memorizing every step of the Sacrament. And there are a lot of steps. The biggest of these is reciting the Act of Contrition - a prayer asking for forgiveness and pledging to do your best to behave.The prayer I had to learn was full of "thee" and "thou" and "how art thou.." - basically a lot of words that seem fancy and weird on the tongue of a second grader. We had to stand in front of the class and say it out loud. And if you messed up... well, I actually don't remember what happened, but it probably ended up with a loss of recess or writing the prayer at home 200 times.
I remember my First Confession too. It was at night, all of us second graders and our parents and siblings were there. I staked my place in line at one of the confessionals in the back of the church, the ones where the only choice was to talk to the priest through the screen. SCORE! Way less scary when the priest can't see you and has no idea who you are. It was almost my turn, and there appeared Sister Marie. And she made me go to the line where the ONLY option was face to face, and with the Scariest Priest We Had. I remember being terrified. Terrified to say no to her, terrified to stand in his line.
I remember walking in, and being so very scared I would mess up. I got through it. Shaking like a leaf. He was a big man with a booming voice. I have no recollection of what sins I had to share, and no recollection of what my penance was. Only the sweaty palms and the shaky voice.
Now that I am an adult, maybe Sister Marie wasn't that scary. And maybe Father wasn't that terrifying.
What is my point in all this?
Eileen has her First Confession on Saturday morning.
The Act of Contrition she has to memorize is full of normal "American" words.
And today, do you know what she told me?
"Mommy! We get to take a Cheat Sheet into the Confessional in case we get scared and mess up!"
WHAT?? A CHEAT SHEET!? WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE!?
(in all fairness, I fully support all things the Church is doing to be less ancient, but damn!!)
Stay tuned for Future Editions re: the Cool Factor also known as Communion.
