mini me says...: Say Cheese.

My mom always took loads of pictures, and she still does.

There's no doubt that trait was passed on to me. And I'm so very glad.

Tomorrow, Eileen will graduate from MStar... the school she has attended since she was 15 weeks old. Her entire life so far has been spent there. Her teachers not only taught her - they taught me as well.

I will never forget within her FIRST week there, Miss Margaret telling me that Eileen was teething. And I was floored. I seriously would have never figured that out. (ok, well i guess eventually the little white things in her gums would have clued me in...). And then around the time she was six months old, Miss NaeNae telling us that we could have her 'practice' sitting up by propping her against things (OK - wait - IS it six months when they start to sit? I honestly don't remember). Again, I was floored. Who knew one could be in training, for SITTING?!

So, speaking of forgetting things.. that is another reason I am so very glad to have endless photographs. I honestly do not remember the baby in these photos. I mean, I don't remember Eileen looking like this. This roly poly baby who has endless hilarious expressions just for the lens. If it weren't for these pictures I'm not sure what I would and would not remember.

And it's no wonder that these days, I can hardly get her to actually smile a good smile - because the kid has been smiling at the camera in her face since Day One. Literally.

(yeah - someday she'll want to throttle me for this potty shot...)

The first photo in this post.. that was Eileen at roughly 24hours old. Smiling - literally smiling - at the camera.

I logged into Shutterfly to track down some of these - and I have well over 500 albums there. FIVE HUNDRED. Some of which were pre-Eileen, but most certainly the bulk of which ARE Eileen.

(hey now. don't anyone go telling the folks at shutterfly about me. they'll suspend my account or something for breaking the internet).

So. Tomorrow she graduates. And maybe it hasn't hit me. Maybe it's because now that Edie is around, there's still many more years at MStar, and many more milestones to get to see again. And maybe its because of all the fun I know awaits Eileen - and me- as she starts 'real school.'

(of course anyone who knows anything about MStar doesn't doubt for one minute that it is nothing short of a 'real school....')

Funny tho.. because as I sit here and mention the part about so many fun things to come.. I realize how very fast the past (almost) six years have flown by.

And I think of Court, who will graduate HighSchool in five days. And I think of how when I met Court three years ago, she was this little girl not yet fifteen. Braces and figuring out high school. And how her Mom (who happens to be one of my best friends) would always talk about how very much Eileen reminded her of Court at 'that age.'

And I think of Court, and the recent pictures of late of her at football games, and winter formals, heading to prom and Senior Functions. She's gorgeous and happy and smiling, surrounded by her friends.

<-- And then I look at this photo. Of Eileen and her buddies last week. And it shocks me, strikes me- look at them. They're five going on seventeen. Posing and smiling and hugging and hamming it up for the camera. Gorgeous and happy and smiling, surrounded by friends. Just like Court.

And that part, 'just like Court' - that really drives it home. At least for me. Just how much Eileen does have ahead of her, and how insanely fast it will go.

I like to think that for the most part, I do live in the moment. Events like having lived in NYC before, during and after 9/11. Josh and I (and Sarah and Bill) sharing custody of Eileen - which in the end has me so much more 'there' with her when she's home. Having people like Sarah in my life who have survived unfathomable loss keeps perspective in the front of my mind (well, most days anyway).

Whatever the reasons are that I manage to remember to live in the moment, while they brought pain, in the end they've brought lessons. And while down the road I may FORGET the moments in which I lived, I will have pictures. I will have endless pictures to remind me of this insane little girl who I love beyond words. And for that I will always be thankful.

Nana Janet may have driven us batty with the camera when we were kids, as I am sure I do now with Eileen.. but if Nana Janet taught us nothing else (HAHAHAHA.. riiight).. she taught us to smile and say cheese. Not sure there's any better lesson than that.

So, tomorrow we'll have PreK Graduation. The kids will sing off key and march across the stage in mini caps and gowns. The parents will take endless pictures and sit in mini-people chairs with our knees in our noses. And we'll laugh and smile and try to pretend we're not crying. And we'll try to pretend we're not scared to death about how to handle KINDERGARTEN. And we'll have our smartphones and we'll take loads of photos and bombard you all on facebook as we post like mad.