Yeah, it's one of those picture-less posts. There are times when I have blog ideas running rampant through my head and they don't always coincide with when I've gotten around to uploading and editing recent photos.
but i figure you're not actually here to see pictures of Mini Me right?! you're here because of my ever-entertaining writing style!
"Do you ALWAYS carry an extra pair of shoes in your purse?!"... that was asked of me by one of my good friends mom's. at Pre-K graduation. And the answer is yes, yes I do. At least in the summer! My love of flip-flops is no secret. I also happen to work in Corporate America, where flip-flops aren't always a good fit. So, especially on a day I wear heels.. YEP.. I have flip-flops on hand. And at graduation, I'd had on heels... and promptly switched into flip flops (cute ones of course), therefore my silver heels were stashed in my purse.
(for the record, said friend's mom agreed with my brilliant idea).
"Yeah man. The water is definitely more salty today than it was yesterday..." overheard last week at the beach. Ok. wait. what? I realize I am not eligible for MENSA, but is that possible? I mean can the ocean be more salty one day than another? To the level that a human (one who has consumed a good deal of Miller Lite) can actually tell?
Speaking of the beach. The general population - nothing short of terrifying.
At the condo we rented, there are rentable chairs/umbrellas. Set up for you each morning along the water's edge. The guys who run the outfit generally place you in the same spot, next to the same people, for the week. In most cases this makes sense. Unless you are placed next to the Grumpiest Parents on Earth. To review: we're at THE BEACH. No rain, temps in low 80s, no humidity. Insanely white soft sand, turquoise water with waves big enough to play in yet small enough to not rip you in half. There were two boys- roughly 7-9 years old, and a daughter around 14 or 15. The boys were pretty normal - lots of energy, short attention spans, and a little sibling bickering..certainly not overly obnoxious bratty kids. The girl was pleasant and helpful and nice. These parents did nothing but snipe at their kids. Loudly and with super nasal-y whiney voices. I think the life had been just sucked out of Dad. I felt bad for the kids, but not so bad that we didn't ask to please not be seated next to them anymore. Maybe the kids don't notice it because they are used to it. Maybe I only have one (and a half) kids and I have less reason to be a Professional Nagger. For more fun, the parents are unfamiliar with headphones. Happy Mom was new to her iPhone, but she'd figured out how to make it play music. And decided she wanted to go to the water. Hands it to Lifeless Dad. Sitting about 18 inches from me. Lifeless Dad proceeds to hold the phone to his ear and listen to the music. Are you kidding?! I mean, sure, maybe the iPhone is new to you. But headphones? Those came out about 100 years ago along with Sony Walkmans. and they come with the iPhone! I exercised massive self control in that instance. And rewarded myself with another cocktail.
Then there was Mature Couple in Black Sneakers. K, I have serious issues with Black Sneakers anyway. They bother me to no end. Especially when worn by a woman pushing 80, walking the beach in a bikini, and black sneakers! Don't get me wrong, a woman pushing 80 who can still pull off a bikini AND walk up and down the beach at a quick pace - awesome. BUT can we at least consider WHITE sneakers?!
Rebellious Sun Bather. We're not entirely sure he was 21; his cocktail of choice was in a glass bottle. Beach Cop in jeep-wheely thingy pulls up and tells him "this is a glass-free beach." So. Most of us who may or may not have a cocktail on the beach would have beer in a CAN or have a thermos of a fruity concoction poured over ice in a plastic cup. And if for some reason any of us with cocktails on the beach in a glass container were visited by a cop, we'd apologize profusely, dump the liquid and run at full speed to the nearest trash can, receive a stern look from Beach Cop and go on with the day. Not Rebellious Sun Bather. He opted to argue with the Cop! He didn't appear inebriated. Stupid yes, but he hadn't had enough of the Glass Bottle to make him drunk. Yet he still chose to argue. and of course 20 minutes later had no Glass Bottle and One Beach Cop Ticket.. I'd say he was lucky to have escaped handcuffs? We were baffled. I mean WHAT sort of argument could he have had for the cop!?
And lastly. Green Goggle Mom. This mom, well. Bless her. She'd walk down to the beach, wearing the goggles. Not like propped up on her forehead - actually wearing them over her eyes. She'd set up their towels and chairs and kiddo, wearing the green goggles. Then play in the sand, wearing the green goggles. You know, I have no idea if she actually went in the water or wore them in the water. Because I started to get so spooked by the Green Goggles that I gave up watching her.
So we're home. There's more stories from the weekend and from Camp Monkey. And from yours truly. lets just say I face planted in my OWN kitchen on Monday morning (while carrying tomato stakes and a watering can). And that several hours later, in true Mini Me Fashion.. Eileen face planted in her own room while cleaning it after tripping over a toy on the floor she'd yet to put away. Today in the span of 30 minutes there were three major space cadet moments (one may or may not have been that my contacts were in the wrong eyes, AGAIN). Clearly life has returned to it's normal state of "seriously erin you had to have made that up it just doesn't actually happen to people!" yes. yes it does.
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